RP for renegadeinexile

[thecricketer]

The Doctor had his head beneath the console, a tool kit at his side, and his hands plunged in very delicate wiring.

He didn't need to make this repair, not strictly; the TARDIS ran well enough without it. But it would make reactions just a bit smoother, just a bit swifter - and besides, he felt he owed her some tender caring to anyway.

It certainly wasn't because he needed something to distract him while he waited.

He wasn't impatient, he decided as he pulled a thin silver rod from the ancient box; he'd given her as much time as she needed and he'd meant it. He just...well, he never was good at standing still, really, especially when there were nagging thoughts to run from.

So he worked, and was content, and sometimes he smiled. He already knew what their first real trip should be - he'd promised already, after all.

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[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She blinked, and then her cheeks coloured slightly as the honour he was granting her sank in. "Thank you," she murmured, rounding to the navigational input.

She hovered there for a few moments, almost as if working up the nerve to touch the controls. Then her hand reached down, fingertips dancing across the keys as she input the coordinates. "I haven't forgotten," she mused. "It's been two lifetimes since I was there, but I still know the way back."

Her gaze lifted, and met his. "It's been the closest thing I've had to a home planet since I left Gallifrey."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

He answered her gratitude with a soft smile, and watched silently as she set to work. It was very strange, and oddly pleasant.

Then she spoke, as his smile became tender, and then faded.

She couldn't return to Gallifrey.

His hand found hers, resting lightly over it, and he didn't speak of their lost world - the world he would lose, and he could do nothing to change it.

Instead, he said, softly, "That's what Earth has been for me." So she knew that, in some way, he understood.

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She realised, as his hand settled gently over hers, that this was the first time she'd been offered any understanding over what she'd lost--what they had lost.

Even his other self, in seeking absolution or forgiveness or whatever it was he'd sought at their last meeting--he'd merely offered up his own guilt, his own burden.

So the understanding of the idea of a second home--particularly now that their real home was lost to them--it caught her by surprise, and overwhelmed her for a moment before she could pull herself back together. She blinked rapidly to try to dismiss the tears that welled up in her eyes; once she was sure she wouldn't do something so stupid as to cry or have her voice crack, she lifted her gaze and spoke softly.

"I imagined it must be something like that, as much as you seemed to go there. I'd love to see that planet through your eyes sometime."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

Once more he waited, silent, as if he didn't notice what she was fighting to control. He knew, if it was him, that he wouldn't want anyone to see.

When he answered, though, his voice was very quiet, tender, and he squeezed her hand.

"We could visit London, one day. I'll show you what I see."

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She smiled gratefully, her eyes shining.

"I'd be honoured to have you show me."

Then she reached down and flipped the switch to set them in flight.

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

He smiled back as they faded from conventional Time and Space, a smooth transition this time.

"I'll look forward to it."

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She stood silently for a few moments, smiling at him. Then she stirred, lacing her fingers through his and giving his hand a soft squeeze. "It's been two lifetimes since I was there," she said. "They won't recognise me at all. New face, new body... new person."

She laughed softly. "I'm almost nervous about it. I don't know why."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

"Perhaps it's better that way," he said softly. "To see the world as yourself, rather than their ruler?"

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She nodded thoughtfully. "Perhaps it is. I never really saw the world as anything but their ruler... I didn't live there long before my marriage, and even then I lived in the palace."

Then she grinned, rueful and nostalgic at the same time. "When I left, I couldn't wait to get away. I didn't think I'd miss it so much."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

The Doctor smiled softly, nodded, and his gaze dropped to the console. It was now, of course, that he remembered what he liked about home. What he didn't want to fade into nothing but memories.

When he looked up, the melancholy had passed, and his voice was light.

"What time did you set the coordinates for?" How long after she left, was the real question.

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She realised what must have been behind his silence; much as he had allowed her moments to pass without hard scrutiny or judgement, she kept her attention on the console until he spoke, giving him what time and space she could.

She lifted her gaze to meet his, smiling faintly. "We'll get there about twenty years after I left."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

He returned the smile, relief guiding the turn of his lips.

"How much do you suppose it's changed, in your absence?"

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She shook her head briefly. "I can't even imagine," she murmured.

A thought briefly flashed across her mind... meeting the Doctor again in his sixth incarnation. Being discovered stealing neurotransmitters from people on Earth to help the people of Miasmia Goria she'd turned into experimental subjects.

"...let's hope they're better off, mmm?"

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

If he wanted to probe - and he rather did, really - this would be the time to do it. A number of questions sprang to his mind immediately, as they tended to do. He could ask any one of them.

"I'm sure they're getting on well enough." A pause, and then, at last, an inquiry he thought harmless.

"Was there anyone to take your place, when you left?"

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She nodded slowly. "The Raja had a nephew. I handed the throne over to him when I abdicated. He was the closest surviving relative at the time, so according to law and custom, he should rightfully have had the throne. He was also rather a wise young man, so I felt no hesitation in doing so."

She studied him a moment, and then offered, as if trying to anticipate another question, "I ruled for nearly a century. I married the Raja when I was two hundred sixty-three, rather soon after both my first regeneration and my first exile."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

He nodded, brow furrowing slightly in faint concern - he found himself hoping she'd been right in her assessment. If something went wrong...

Well, that was what he did, wasn't it? He made things right again.

His eyes widened when she spoke again; he hadn't expected more information but he certainly welcomed it.

"You were young," he said quietly, and there was some mix of sympathy and admiration in his voice. Rassilon knew he couldn't manage that now, never mind when he was barely three hundred.

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

"Very much so, yes. I can see that now, looking back."

Her eyes drifted from his, appearing to aimlessly study a spot over his shoulder as she spoke. "Young enough to think that I could do everything. And that I knew everything."

She sighed, and smiled, though it had a bit of a bitter edge to it. "I wasn't ready for any of it. I simply hadn't had the life experience or the social experience to successfully navigate that mess," she said, with surprising candor.

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

"I vaguely remember those days, yes," he said with a faint smile. "Sometimes I think I regress..." He shook his head, and the smile faded.

"That you can admit it now shows how far you've come, then." He ran a hand through his hair, suddenly feeling rather awkward.

"If it's any consolation I'd have probably done a worse job..."

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

Her smile widened at that, touched. "I'd like to think I've come a long way since then, yes," she replied. "And somehow I doubt you'd have done all that badly."

The TARDIS materalised with its usual soft thump, and she gazed down at the display to verify their location. "Good. Twenty years after my abdication, as promised. We've landed in Goa. That's the capital city."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

His grin came quite suddenly, and he stepped away from the console, offering his hand.

"Care to give me the royal tour?"

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She couldn't help but laugh softly as she took his hand. "I'd be delighted," she replied, depressing the lever to open the doors.

They stepped out onto a bustling street on a sunny afternoon under a faintly red-tinged sky. People in brightly-coloured and boldly-patterned clothing moved to and fro, walking, riding in large carriages, stopping at the storefronts along both sides of the street. The place had a decided air of 25th-century space outpost meets Colonial India about it.

The Rani smiled as she closed the doors behind them, pausing to take in the sights for a few moments. "This is, for want of a better term the high street."

She turned, and gestured with her free hand toward a formidable-looking fortress, with spires and orange walls. "And that's the palace. That was my home."

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

"Looks cosy," he replied with raised eyebrows, lips curving again as he met her gaze. He had, of course, been looking every which way, taking in everything he could. He'd never visited this world; he'd already decided it was rather pleasant, but that may have been the company.

There was, of course, something about a bright, bustling world that seemed to be at peace. Somehow he didn't seem to frequent those.

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

She grinned at that, squeezing his hand. "As cosy as a place with two hundred rooms can be, yes."

Her eyes scanned their surroundings, drinking in every detail. "I always did rather find this place beautiful," she murmured in a very small voice, suddenly realising just how much she'd missed it.

[thecricketer.livejournal.com]

He returned the smile, but several moments passed before he spoke again; he knew when to allow one to look in silence.

"Is there any place in particular you'd like to visit?" he asked softly.

[thisway-comes.livejournal.com]

"Erm." Her eyes darted quickly to the palace, and she laughed softly. "Let's not go there."

She bit her lip, thinking, and then her eyes lit up. "Come on," she said, tugging at his hand. "I know just the place for you."